Monday, March 23, 2015


Yesterday she said, "Mama, I've learned something about myself. I'm a little bit boy." I like this, but to her being a little bit boy means that she likes dinosaurs, dirt, and playing with boys who don't go for a lot of drama.

Sunday, March 15, 2015


dandelion, mango, cucumber, lime

thirty pounds by friday {because the one thing I have is a sense of humor}

The stars aligned this week, and I had a chance to meet four times with a personal trainer at the gym. She works with me at the preschool and needed to work a certain number of free hours at the gym. Please let me introduce you to her if you would ever like to do something like this. My kids (and my little kids in my preschool) had spring break this week, so I had the time and energy to take on something very new.  I have had a gym membership for years, but I am pretty self conscious while I am there. I didn't know how to use all of the equipment, and I didn't want to talk to all those super fit people who seem to know what they are doing. I know. It is my problem.

I have been lifting weights, doing yoga, and even went to my first spinning class. That was the hardest thing I've done since before Ella was born--hardest exercise in fourteen years.  It was insane, and I'm going again this Wednesday. Thursday morning I had to pull myself out of bed with my arms.

I also did a full week of the Eat to Live diet. That part is simple. Plants. No added oil. I takes a bit of prep work, but I like eating this way.  As hard as I've worked this week I thought I'd drop ten pounds, and I have been joking that I was losing thirty pounds by Friday. I lost 2 pounds. I think I'm taller, at least in my head.

Monday, March 09, 2015

blood orange, beet, carrot, dandelion greens

It's spring break here in Appalachia, and all the snow has finally melted. Birds are building nests in the bluebird boxes. One of my friends at work just got her personal trainer certification, and she has offered to meet me at the gym and work on an exercise program. I'm meeting her every day this week, so hopefully I'll still be able to walk by Friday.

Thursday, February 26, 2015

and then it snowed again

I have really enjoyed being at home today with a fire going, and I'm about to go out and sled with Ruby, but I needed to see some greens, some raspberry pickers, leaves on the trees.

Thursday, February 19, 2015

between snowstorms

My dearest Universe. Please stop snowing and warm up. The pipes are freezing, and the children won't stop eating all the food. Also vomiting.

Sunday, February 08, 2015

burnt norton

Time present and time past
Are both perhaps present in time future,
And time future contained in time past.
If all time is eternally present
All time is unredeemable.
What might have been is an abstraction 
Remaining a perpetual possibility
Only in a world of speculation.
What might have been and what has been
Point to one end, which is always present.
Footfalls echo in the memory
Down the passage which we did not take
Towards the door we never opened
Into the rose-garden. My words echo
Thus, in your mind.
                     But to what purpose
Disturbing the dust on a bowl of rose-leaves
I do not know.
                Other echoes
Inhabit the garden. Shall we follow?
Quick, said the bird, find them, find them,
Round the corner. Through the first gate,
Into our first world, shall we follow
The deception of the thrush? Into our first world.
There they were, dignified, invisible,
Moving without pressure, over the dead leaves,
In the autumn heat, through the vibrant air,
And the bird called, in response to
The unheard music hidden in the shrubbery,
And the unseen eyebeam crossed, for the roses 
Had the look of flowers that are looked at.
There they were as our guests, accepted and accepting.
So we moved, and they, in a formal pattern,
Along the empty alley, into the box circle,
To look down into the drained pool.
Dry the pool, dry concrete, brown edged,
And the pool was filled with water out of sunlight,
And the lotos rose, quietly, quietly,
The surface glittered out of heart of light,
And they were behind us, reflected in the pool.
Then a cloud passed, and the pool was empty.
Go, said the bird, for the leaves were full of children,
Hidden excitedly, containing laughter.
Go, go, go, said the bird: human kind
Cannot bear very much reality.
Time past and time future
What might have been and what has been
Point to one end, which is always present.

t.s. eliot